He Knows Me

“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out
    before a single day had passed. Psalm 139:13-16 (NLT)

Psalm 139 is one of my favorite scriptures. It speaks to my very core. It is amazing to me that our Lord took the traits of my parents and knit them together to form me. I am different from my sisters as we were each knit together by our Lord. As things are made by loving hands, they are never exactly the same, especially knitted articles. The basic layout may be identical, but the variations are different.

Last week as I rewatched episodes of The Chosen, the Lord impressed upon me something that I had never really thought of. I love it when things like that happen. The scene showed a mute/deaf man being healed by Jesus. The scene showed the actor touching the man and feeling his neck. The man was healed (Mark 7:31-35, 31 Then Jesus left the vicinity of Tyre and went through Sidon, down to the Sea of Galilee and into the region of the Decapolis. 32 There some people brought to him a man who was deaf and could hardly talk, and they begged Jesus to place his hand on him. 33 After he took him aside, away from the crowd, Jesus put his fingers into the man’s ears. Then he spit and touched the man’s tongue. 34 He looked up to heaven and with a deep sigh said to him, “Ephphatha!” (which means “Be opened!”). 35 At this, the man’s ears were opened, his tongue was loosened and he began to speak plainly.” (NLT))

While I was familiar with this scripture, I knew what would happen. But, what came to mind is this, when Jesus walked the earth, and He put His perfect hands on individuals, He knew them. He knew how they were created. He knew how they were knit together. He knew the way the body was formed. Yes, today, physicians know the body and how it is formed, and they heal through medicine. But, our Lord, KNEW and knows each of us.

What an incredible thing to be able to go to Jesus and ask for healing. I believe He still heals today as Hebrews 8:13 tells us,  Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. ” (NLT)

How wonderful is it when we can go to the One who knit us together and ask for healing?


“Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord.” Romans 12:19 (NLT)

Years ago I lived in a world where control reigned. Fortunately, that is no longer the case. A lesson was learned that being a control freak is just an outward expression of inward pain.

Control left my life and life was easier. Every once in a while I feel control rising in our home. I react accordingly and it is not pleasant. I either shut down completely or I react with anger. Neither are good things.

In the past few days I was once more confronted with a controlling person. I was proud of myself because I did not shut down. I did not get angry. I stayed like myself. I met the disagreeable tone with answers that were measured and calm. I stepped outside and prayed. Prayed for the person who is struggling with their inward pain and prayed that I would not do what every fiber of my being wanted to do, lash out.

Control is a difficult thing in our lives. When our lives feel so out of control and we have no choice in what is happening, we grasp hold of what we can and manipulate it into a shape where we can have a say. Control wears you out. The person controlling and the person who is being controlled. It robs you of peace and calm. It distances itself from true happiness.

You settle. You rationalize about the situation. You look for hope. Even in all of it, you do experience growth. You see, the Lord is in the midst of control if you look for Him. He is waiting for a hand to reach out towards Him. He is whispering in the quiet of the night. He understands and loves in spite of it all.

Today I woke up feeling raw inside. I wasn’t sick, but there was a familiar feeling deep within me. It feels like the hurt of a burnt finger that is blistered. It’s small, but it’s painful. I realized that in the corners of my being that long time hurt resides. It’s there for remembrance, to recognize certain situations. Today, though, if felt like it had been poked harshly and was once more wounded.

Since I recognized it, I have asked the Lord to touch that area. Once more I go to prayer, this time to earnestly pray for those suffering from the bonds of control. I do not have to do anything, for it is in God’s hands.

“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.” I Peter 5:7 (NLT)

Once upon a time, I worried about everything. I worried I would do something wrong. I would mess up. I would fail. But, that was long ago. I have learned, sometimes the hard way, to cast my cares on God. He is big enough to handle them. He can hear my screaming, my agony, my tears. He has never failed me. I know that when things get like this, I can climb up on His lap and His perfect arms wrap around me and heal, even the deepest hurts and disturbances.

External Scars

We all carry scars on our body. I have several. One is where I fell on a sickle cut branch and broke a stick off in my leg. It ended up circling around my leg and coming out the same hole it went in. But, that’s another story.

Another scar is from when I slipped in a parking lot area and fell on a spike laying on the side of the road.

Later on I received a scar after cutting some bread and cut my finger instead.

Yes, we all carry scars. Each scar has a story behind it. Some of the stories make you grimace and some are just wonderfully funny stories. Scars show a life well lived.

External scars can be talked about for the most part. They are noticeable and can become conversation starters.

There is another type of scar though. These scars are the ones not seen. Looking at a person you can never tell what internal scars they have. Broken hearts are not readily visible, nor are trauma scars, emotional scars, scars from grief or scars of rejection. Each of us also carry those scars. It’s just that we hide them, tucked away in our inner being.

What if those internal scars revealed themselves? Somehow showing the slight bump or thinner skin like the ones I talked about? How would we deal with them?

I have heard that I have great insight. Ha! I think any insight I may have is first of all, from the Lord. Secondly, any insight comes from internal scars that I carry with me. Sometimes it is referred to as the school of hard knocks, I personally refer to it as life.

One of my favorite scriptures is Psalm 139:14, “14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.” (NKJV)

Each one of us was created in our Mother’s womb. Carefully knit together by the hand of God. He lovingly created our lives, knowing that the form developing in the womb would one day be scarred, internally and externally. It’s not what He desires, but, we are in this world. We fall down, we get hurt, people hurt us. With each bump and bruise we recover, but we are not the same.

Some external wounds take time to heal, and leave a reminder of what happened. Some internal wounds do the same, taking a season to heal and leaving a tender area in us. Since the internal wounds are hidden, they sometimes are never fully healed.

Isaiah 53:3-5 talks about our Lord and how He came to heal us, externally and internally. “He was despised and rejected—  a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care. Yet it was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down. And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God, a punishment for his own sins! But he was pierced for our rebellion,
crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed.” (NLT)

Sometimes it’s easier to believe that outer injuries can be easily taken to the Lord. It’s easier to say, I believe, and wait to see a healing done to our bodies. It’s the internal that we keep hidden that is harder to believe for. We hide that broken heart, that broken spirit, the trauma, the emotional abuse, it’s not something we can talk about. Nonetheless, we need to take that to our Lord. His stripes that He bore for us, heal our entire person, inside and out.

I encourage you, if there is something in the recesses of your heart that is hard on you, take that first little step and let our Lord look at it. He can and will heal you.

“He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.” Psalm 147:3 (NLT)

The Lord who Heals Me ~ Jehovah Rapha

I am the God that Healeth thee I am the Lord Your healer I sent My word
And I healed your disease I am the Lord Your healer

You are the God that Healeth me You are the Lord My healer You sent Your word And You healed my disease You are the Lord My healer You sent Your word And You healed My disease You are the Lord My healer You sent Your word And You healed My disease You are the Lord My healer
Lyrics Don Moen, I am the Lord who healeth you

Exodus 1:2-26 says, “So he cried out to the Lord, and the Lord showed him a tree. When he cast it into the waters, the waters were made sweet. There He made a statute and an ordinance for them, and there He tested them, 26 and said, “If you diligently heed the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in His sight, give ear to His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have brought on the Egyptians. For I am the Lord who heals you.” (NKJV)

We acknowledge that God is a mighty God, that He is good, just, protects, provides and sees us, but most stop there. Our God heals. Let me repeat that, Our God Heals.

I think our health is one issue we pray for the most. It’s easy to say we need prayer and mention an infirmity. How often do we ask for prayer and while being prayed for we are thinking, well, we’ll see what the doctor says when I go this week? I am guilty of this.

In response to this, I have to challenge myself and ask rightly, ‘If I am thinking of a doctor then why am I asking for prayer?’ Do I believe that God is more capable than a physician here on earth? God is the great Physician. He is Jehovah Rapha.

The New Testament is filled with healing miracles from Jesus and through His disciples. Our God heals.

Now, the wavering I have felt at times could be legitimate, but, I have seen God heal. He removed a tumor in me and left scar tissue, which confounded my surgeon. It was years ago and you can still see the scar tissue to this day on a mammogram.

I have seen blind people regain their sight. Twice I have seen this. One was a teenager and the other a grown man. One in Maine and the other in San Diego.

I have seen someone healed from pancreatic cancer, seen it totally removed from a person who was in the late stages of the disease.

Yes, God heals. He does it today. It wasn’t for olden times, biblical times, His healing is for now. Yet, do we pray expecting to receive a miracle? Do we ask in faith believing?

Jehovah-Rapha, You are the God who heals. Heal all reading who need a physical, emotional or mental touch from You. Remove disease, restore health to bodies. Heal those who are mentally and emotionally exhausted, restore peace and calm to them. Lord, let us pray believing that You will hear and heal. Thank you for what You do Lord. Amen

God’s Sense of Humor

I have said that God has a sledge hammer sitting beside His throne which has my name on it. He picks it up on occasion to whop me across the head to get my attention. It usually works.

I have also said that I make God roll His eyes and groan a lot. He also laughs at my antics. I don’t do that on purpose, but I just know I am THAT child. The one you watch and chuckle and shake your head at. THAT one.

As I had mentioned earlier I had to have a procedure done this week. In the mid 90’s I was diagnosed with a tumor in my right breast. Before going to see a surgeon I had prayer from our pastor at a Friday night prayer meeting. It was a simple prayer, but an incredible healing. I could not move from my chair for about twenty minutes and I just kept giggling. A week later I went to the surgeon and told him that I had had prayer and that the Lord had healed me. The doctor did not believe me. He examined me to the point that I felt like he was counting my vertebrae from my front. He finally asked his nurse what she felt. She said scar tissue. At the time, I smiled at the doctor and said, I told you I was healed. Then I laughed all the way back to my office.

I have often been able to share this healing with others and each time I get excited. This week I had to have a biopsy on my right breast. A friend of mine reminded me that that one was healed miraculously and that God does not remove His healing. Throughout this whole situation, I have been very calm and peaceful. I didn’t even get nervous when I went in and had the biopsy. It was so cool, I watched it on the screen while it was happening.

So today I got the results. The first results came via My Chart. It was the reports from the radiologist and the doctor who read the results. I went to google to look up words. All was confusing. I handed my laptop over to my husband and he was equally confused. I decided to wait until I got a phone call before I said anything. I did not have to wait long as the phone rang within minutes of the email.

The result was benign with some scarring. Now, I know the scarring can mean many things, but to me, it was a reminder that God has healed me and He was recalling to mind that He lets us know when He has been in a situation. I like to think He is on His throne shaking His head at me and thinking, “I told you I would never leave you.”

How many instances in our lives do we fail to see God’s humor? I love that He made me smile today for several reasons.

Psalm 2:4a, “He who sits in the heavens shall laugh;” (NKJV) I know that is taken out of context, but I truly believe that God has joy in us and He does laugh and smile when He is working out His perfect plan for us.