No Weapon

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“No weapon formed against you shall prosper, And every tongue which rises against you in judgment You shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, And their righteousness is from Me,” Says the Lord.” Isaiah 54:17 (NKJV)

Weapons come in many ways. When thinking of weapons, we usually go to firearms or the military. Our minds turn to hostile situations that fill the evening news, wars, revolts, or hostage and school shootings. These are all legitimate thoughts.

Many of us will never be in those situations.

Weapons formed against us can be a harsh word or tone, a situation where you feel boxed in and cannot escape, the panic you feel in a given experience. Weapons can be our mind-set, how we think we are and how we tear ourselves apart.

There was a season in my life where I felt besieged. In my desolation and loneliness I found no comfort. Dale was deployed on an isolated tour, which means he was overseas in a place where we, his family, could not go. I had my daughters, but I needed to be the strong one, the adult. I tried my best to be strong, to do my part, but inside I was crumbling. Falling apart like an old stone wall hit just the right way.

I went to church, but hid in the back rows, hoping no one would talk with me. I tried to pray but felt like my prayers went nowhere. I read the Word but the words seemed empty. It was a winter season for me. I was dormant and lifeless.

The Lord broke through this darkness with these verses that brought life back into me. It did not happen at once, but, it did give me the strength to move. “casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” I Peter 5:7 (NKJV) and “So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 (NLT)

I remember in gaining victory over this season, I would walk through my house in almost a marching fashion. With each step I would declare, NO. Weapon. Formed. Against. ME. will. prosper. A declaration that my God did not forsake me. He was with me then and will be with me forever.

Shield of Faith

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“Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. 14 Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. 15 For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. 16 In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. 17 Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.” Ephesians 6:13-17 (NLT)

I love the 6th chapter of Ephesians, especially about the whole armor of God. For years I have dressed myself in this armor before getting out of bed. I know without that armor on me the day will be a long one.

For the most part I remember how I dressed in the morning. I feel confident in the Lord. I confess though, I recently feel like my feet are covered, my body is covered, but my sword is dragging behind me marking lines in the ground behind me. In my other hand the shield is flopping in rhythm as I trod along my day.

With each step the armor clanks against the ground and my shoes, almost tripping me. My head hangs down, not in total defeat, but lacking the energy to look ahead.

We all get this way from time to time. We get weary. The strength in our arms is depleted. The sword seems much too large to hold on. We look like a child playing dress up in an adult’s armor. Everything sags, droops and drops.

“Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.” Psalm 43:5 (NKJV)

David felt like that. He probably remembered being dressed in armor to slay Goliath. He removed all the armor, tossed the sword aside and took smooth rocks and his sling. He conquered the giant. Yet, in his life, he was discouraged and distressed. He spoke to his soul, and turned his eyes heavenward.

Years ago I was encouraged by a fellow blogger. He encouraged me to say aloud, “The joy of the Lord is my strength, I have the joy of the Lord.” When we remind ourselves of Whose we are, our head begins to lift. We start to remember that the sword and the shield is custom made for us. It becomes easier to carry that Word in our hearts and our faith is renewed.

“But you, O Lord, are a shield around me;
    you are my glory, the one who holds my head high.” Psalm 3:3 (NLT)

Needing a Hug

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Lately I have needed a hug. Dale holds me and I am comforted in his arms. He is my security and safety here on earth. His arms enfold me and I know that he is my gift from God.

My friends hug me. I am always grateful to have hugs from them. They bring joy to my heart. I smile or laugh in the hugs. Those hugs are sweet short prayers in motion. My friends are also my precious gifts from God.

But, I long for a hug. My heart yearns for an embrace. My soul cries out for a hug.

Last night I talked with a friend who is going to Israel next week. Her husband moved to Heaven almost a year ago. I said how exciting it will be to walk on the ground that Jesus walked on. I then mentioned that her husband is actually walking with Jesus. Nothing tops that.

Since the conversation my mind keeps circling back to what my heart has been dwelling on. I need a hug. I long for a hug. The hug I want is one from Jesus. My desire is to run to Him and throw my arms out and be embraced by Him. To feel His breath on me. To hear His heart beat. To hear Him say my name. To experience the total warmth, the refuge curled up against Him. To know I am finally where I belong, safe in His arms, never to leave His presence.

I know He is not ready for me to be there yet. So, I will relish the quiet times of the day when I hear His voice and feel Him near. I will rejoice during the worship at church, and bathe in the quiet adoration that comes.

“I will be your God throughout your lifetime—until your hair is white with age. I made you, and I will care for you. I will carry you along and save you.” Isaiah 46:4 (NLT)

I am in need of a hug, but I will wait.

Stop Signs, Roadblocks and Detours

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When we first moved to San Diego we obviously had to find a place to live. We stayed with friends during that time and they watched our oldest while we ventured out into our new city full of expectation and excitement. We had our map of San Diego and surrounding areas, as it was well before the days of GPS.

We had lists provided by the base housing office of places that would rent to military personnel. We were set. We got to the right area of the city, the right street and BAM! The street ended and a canyon was where the street should have been. In the distance you could see the beginning of the rest of the street. This could have been a one-off, but no we managed to have potential homes on each street that butted up against a canyon.

Needless to say our frustration levels were high, until it began to be funny. A street filled with houses and you went down them and then there would be a barrier with a reflecting sign on it. We found it funny why the barrier was there when the pavement ended and in front of you was grassy areas and huge trees blocking your way. Didn’t take a rocket scientist to know you couldn’t go any further.

We finally did find a house to rent, and yes, it actually was on a canyon. We learned that San Diego had canyons throughout the city, some pretty beautiful and some that were questionable.

Roadblocks show up in the most inconvenient places. Upon seeing them, we usually hear a deep sigh or a groan. No one likes to see roadblocks.

The same goes with stop signs. We notice how many are around when we are in a hurry to get somewhere. I was guilty of this when it was a season for me being ‘taxi mom’. By Friday evening I would be screaming at any stop sign or traffic light, unless of course, it was green.

Detours are similar to roadblocks, they appear right when you want to head in the direction they are blocking. Occasionally detours provide you with beauty you never would have experienced. Roads not traveled or thought of.

Many times we hear Jeremiah 29:11 quoted. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (NLT) It’s a familiar scripture that gets repeated and repeated. Most of us can repeat it without much thought. Yes, God has a plan for us. Yes, it will give us a future and a hope. We say it like we slap a band-aid on a wound, like it is a cure all.

Sometimes we fail to realize that the plan, that future and that hope come after we hit roadblock after roadblock. That pathway is riddled with stop signs and red lights. That hope is after several detours.

Anyone who has taken a long road trip knows that the destination sometimes takes longer to arrive to. Things are in the way.

If life could be like those mazes on children’s menus, it would be great. You start at the beginning and trace your way to the end. If you can’t figure it out right away you turn the menu around and start from the end and go backwards. Somehow turning the page around allows you to see the path with no lines blocking your crayon.

Life is not so simple. We can’t go to the end and figure it all out. Until then, we follow the signs, trying not to zig when we need to zag. We were given a map more detailed than GPS. Psalm 119:105, “Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.” (NLT)

Spring

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in Just-
spring when the world is mud-
luscious the little
lame balloonman
whistles far and wee
and eddieandbill come
running from marbles and
piracies and it’s
spring
when the world is puddle-wonderful
the queer
old balloonman whistles
far and wee
and bettyandisbel come dancing
from hop-scotch and jump-rope and
it’s
spring
and
the
goat-footed
balloonMan whistles
far
and
wee e.e.cummings

I was introduced to this poem in fourth grade. I immediately fell in love with this poet who ignored conventional grammar. He even used lower case letters for his name. What’s not to love in that?

Since that year many, many years (okay decades) ago, I recite this poem in my mind each year. The words are delicious to me.

When we lived in San Diego there were only a few weeks of real spring. It was when the grasses were green and the poppies bloomed. Then everything returned to normal and most of the grass withered and it was dull.

Spring has been in our area for a while now. The yellow layer on everything outside, the hoarse cough I have all day long, the gummy eyes, the runny nose declares spring to my body. I dislike that part of spring, especially feeling like I am carrying a boulder on my chest with each step. Yes, that’s allergies.

My crocuses have bloomed and faded, the daffodils also. My hyacinths are mere shadows of what they were. The dogwood have shed their beautiful flower and now the leaves are taking over. The azaleas have been stunning this year, vibrant in pink, coral and white. Those blossoms, too, are shedding and soon all that will be is a green bush.

I woke up this morning to hearing rain. Lots of rain! “Ask the Lord for rain in the spring, for he makes the storm clouds. And he will send showers of rain so every field becomes a lush pasture.” Zechariah 10:1 (NLT) It was one of those days where the comfort and warmth of the bed and the gentle sound of raindrops tried to convince me not to get up.

I fought the desire to stay snuggled in my bed listening to the tranquil voice of nature. I walked to my windows and opened the curtains. The ground was saturated. The leaves shone with rain. Before me was a symphony of green. Light greens, yellow greens, dark waxy green all greeted me. Each spring I stand at my window amazed at the glorious creation in my front yard. After years of dullness, our Lord brought me into this harmony of trees, shrubs and flowers.

Surrounding my home today was my reminder of ee cummings. Thank you sir, for the words to describe my outdoors, mud-lucious, and puddle-wonderful. Thank you Lord for the spring rain.

A New Day

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This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NLT)

As I write this on Easter Monday, April 18th, my mind is filled with many thoughts.

First, the day after Jesus rose from the grave, I imagine the joy and smiles on the faces of those closest to Jesus here on earth. The feeling of dread and doom that had filled them was now replaced with wonder and expectation. What was next for these men and women? They had witnessed so much in three years and now another twist in their adventure with Jesus.

Forty five years ago this evening, Dale and I made a commitment to follow Jesus. We both knew Him, heard the sermons and felt like we were pretty good. Our marriage was not only on the rocks, it was wrecked. We argued most of the time and around 6:30 p.m. on this day, we decided that we would divorce. He would stay in Japan, obviously, and I determined that I would go to San Francisco with our dog and start over.

A half hour later saw one of us asking the other what the marriage needed. The answer, “A relationship with Jesus Christ”. These were words neither of us expected. But, we looked at one another, knowing it was the truth. We went to our bedroom, knelt down and prayed together. When we finished praying we looked at one another and we knew that something had changed. We looked with eyes of love, hope and commitment.

On April 19th, 1977 I woke up different. I still looked the same, I was still the same person, but there was a deep change within. I opened up the blinds in our bedroom and looked out. The same four quad-plex buildings surrounded the grassy courtyard, but it appeared the sun shone brighter. Everything was brighter. I felt cleansed, more clean than you feel after showering, it was a deep clean. I guess the way I felt is how your home looks after a deep cleaning. The house glistens. The floors are polished, the furniture dust free, the windows clear, and fresh smells abound. That is the way I felt on the 19th of April, 1977.

Like the disciples the day after Christ arose, I was filled with anticipation, expectation and joy.

 “Could it be any clearer? Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life—no longer captive to sin’s demands! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ’s sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That’s what Jesus did.

That means you must not give sin a vote in the way you conduct your lives. Don’t give it the time of day. Don’t even run little errands that are connected with that old way of life. Throw yourselves wholeheartedly and full-time—remember, you’ve been raised from the dead!—into God’s way of doing things. Sin can’t tell you how to live. After all, you’re not living under that old tyranny any longer. You’re living in the freedom of God. ” Romans 6:6-14 (MSG)

Have I looked at each day like that first? No, but when I stop and quiet myself I still recognize that difference. My whole being shouts to me to be expectant and anticipate what the Lord is going to do today. Each morning is filled with the promise and assurance that God is in control. Nothing is going to happen to me that will take God off of His throne of grace, He is not wringing His perfect hands in worry. He has a plan for my life and yours.

Easter Monday

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Have you ever had a day that you dread? Easter Monday is that day for me. Somehow, as a growing child I would have mishaps on that day.

I can remember my parents saying they were going to tie me in my bed so that no harm could come to me. Of course, they were joking.

Two incidents come to mind quickly when I see Easter Monday approaching. The first required an emergency room visit. My sisters and I were off school, watching mid-morning television, eating our Easter basket goodies and drinking pop (soda, coke, sody-pop, soft drink I have heard them all). Our mother was on the phone talking with a friend. My older sister asked me to go get her more to drink. I said no. She knew I would do it anyway, so she tossed her glass at me. Neither of us thought anything would happen. But, somehow the glass hit just the right way on my knee and exploded, sending chards into my knee. We both panicked and we didn’t want Mom to know what had happened. We slid by her, and went to the bathroom, I am certain she noticed that blood was running down my leg, but we were determined. As my sister was attempting to place band-aids over my knee, our Mother appeared in the bathroom door. I then went to the emergency room where our family physician removed the glass and commented that they were very pretty. They were blue and white glasses. I am certain we were corrected, but we were just being kids.

A few years went by. It was evening on Easter Monday. My sisters and I were outside, shoe-less of course. Again, my older sister asked me to go get her shoes, so she could investigate something. I obliged and ran down our sidewalk in the back of our house. I don’t know how, but, somehow I tripped, slid across the cemented back porch and the aluminum screen door stopped me, but not before I dented in the bottom part of the door with my head. No emergency room visit that time, but no school the next day either.

I occasionally hear about my adventures on Easter Monday, but it is few and far between. In jest I was referred to as Grace. All legs and feet and no coordination.

I smile as I write these memories. I can still recall the glass being removed and the doctor and my Mom laughing at our antics. I can still remember being stopped by screen door and hearing my Dad say, she dented my door.

These are the things that make parents go grey. They are also the stuff of great memories.

“And do everything with love.” 1 Corinthians 16:14 (NLT)

Did we sisters do everything in love? No, of course not. We are a real family. But, we are fiercely devoted to one another, we have each other’s back. The Lord created our family. It was not always easy for us, but, we survived and flourished. Today I would not run to get her shoes, but I would most likely trip at some point. Grace still exists, but now I pass it off to old age.

He is Risen Indeed!

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Christ the Lord is risen today; Christians, haste your vows to pay;
Offer ye your praises meet At the Paschal Victim’s feet.
For the sheep the Lamb hath bled, Sinless in the sinner’s stead;
“Christ is risen,” today we cry; Now He lives no more to die. ~

The week was horrendous, but Sunday is here. The women went to the tomb to anoint Jesus. They wondered how they would move the stone with the Roman seal on it. They really didn’t need to worry about that. The stone was blasted away by the power of a Living God.

“Jesus spoke to her, “Woman, why do you weep? Who are you looking for?”She, thinking that he was the gardener, said, “Sir, if you took him, tell me where you put him so I can care for him.”  Jesus said, “Mary.” Turning to face him, she said in Hebrew, “Rabboni!” meaning “Teacher!”  Jesus said, “Don’t cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go to my brothers and tell them, ‘I ascend to my Father and your Father, my God and your God.’” John 20:15-17 (MSG)

I love these verses. Upon recognizing Him as Jesus, Mary grabs onto Him. Clinging to Him the way we cling to family members we haven’t seen in a while. He had to tell her to stop, because He still had to go to His Father.

How awesome it must have been to see a newly risen Jesus and to hold Him. I cannot wait until it is my turn to cling onto Him. To hear Him say Mary to me.

Today, I plan to honor this Resurrection Sunday. Christ is risen, He is risen Indeed.

Gone

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Death. It seems so final. The emptiness that echoes in your heart. The darkness that creeps on the edges of all you do. The hollow feeling that envelopes you.

Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb. Out of fear, His tomb was sealed. Not only gone, but locked away.

Imagine what the disciples felt. Their friend. Their teacher. Their Lord. Gone and sealed off. Their feelings of desolation must have been indescribable.

“From then on Jesus began to tell his disciples plainly that it was necessary for him to go to Jerusalem, and that he would suffer many terrible things at the hands of the elders, the leading priests, and the teachers of religious law. He would be killed, but on the third day he would be raised from the dead.” Matthew 16:21 (NLT)

Having heard the above from Jesus, as humans we are sometimes slow to comprehend what we have heard when faced with tragedy. I think (and this is my opinion) that one of the disciples would remember this statement and share it, reminding others that there is hope. But, Jesus is full of surprises for us. I can’t imagine how the disciples got through those three days Jesus was in the tomb.

They thought He was lying in there dead, but, no, he was busy. “When I saw him, I fell at his feet as if I were dead. But he laid his right hand on me and said, “Don’t be afraid! I am the First and the Last.  I am the living one. I died, but look—I am alive forever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and the grave.” Revelation 1:17-18 (NLT)

Jesus was working, grabbing the keys to death and hell. I personally cannot wait to hear this story.

For Us, For Me

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“But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins.
He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed.  All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God’s paths to follow our own. Yet the Lord laid on him the sins of us all.” Isaiah 53:5-6 (NLT)

The end of this week we commemorate the events leading to Easter.

Jesus left Heaven and all of it’s glory to come to Earth. He did not have to do this. God the Father created this Earth, He (the Trinity) could have decided that they were done with this creation and with a word ended this whole thing. They decided differently,giving us a pure example of love in parenting, giving our children another try, God chose to send His Son to Earth, making a way for us to discover redemption and relationship.

Jesus came to earth as an infant. He was human, as we are. He cried as an infant, cut teeth, had childhood ailments, ear infections, fevers, colds, and flu. He skinned His knees, stubbed His toes, most likely got sunburned. He came to experience everything we do as humans.

He was human and God. This boggles my brain when I think of it. Have the power of God Almighty and yet choose to be human and restrained in these bodies. He didn’t do it grudgingly, He did it willingly. That humbles me.

On Thursday night we remember the Last Supper. Jesus brought his friends and followers together. He knew one would betray Him, and yet Jesus celebrated with this man. He broke bread with him, He included him. I couldn’t do that. If I knew someone was going to stab me in the back, I would keep that person at a distance and have no fellowship with them. Not Jesus, He feasted with Judas.

After the feast, Jesus went off to pray, His disciples slept off the meal, even after hearing that Jesus was going to be betrayed. What did Jesus pray? He prayed for us. He prayed for our protection. He prayed that we would continue in God. He thanked Father God for us, for me. (John 17)

When we have an appointment like a dentist or surgery there is a feeling of panic. We dread going. We ask for prayer. We warily approach the time of what we feel is going to cause us agony.

Not many of us go through what Jesus did. Yes, people around the world have been persecuted and martyred, but for the most part, we have no idea what that agony is like. We panic at the sound of a drill, or the sight of a needle.

Jesus knew. He knew what was about to happen. He knew He would be brought in front for a mock trial. He would be beaten. Not like what we see in movies, He was beaten, think about a piece of meat we have tenderized with a meat mallet. How that meat is stretched and mutilated. That is what Jesus did for us, for me.

That was just the beginning. He was crowned with thorns. Not those jiggers we get from roses or brush. Thorns long enough to piece through His skull. He did it for us. He did it for me.

We complain when we have to carry a bunch of groceries up stairs and we think it is so inconvenient and hard. Jesus carried His cross. With a pounding bloody head, and His flesh torn apart. He did it for us. He did it for me.

All of this sounds terrible. I know I haven’t begun to truly describe what He went through. After all of this, Jesus was nailed to a cross. His flesh, once more thrust with pain and agony. When we first went to Japan, we had an English language paper delivered to our home. One day, I opened the paper to see photos of several people crucified. Crucifixion was still allowable then. I stared at the photos in disbelief. They were gruesome and I was stunned. Jesus allowed Himself to be crucified, because of us, because of me.

“This is the kind of life you’ve been invited into, the kind of life Christ lived. He suffered everything that came his way so you would know that it could be done, and also know how to do it, step-by-step. He never did one thing wrong, Not once said anything amiss. They called him every name in the book and he said nothing back. He suffered in silence, content to let God set things right. He used his servant body to carry our sins to the Cross so we could be rid of sin, free to live the right way. His wounds became your healing. You were lost sheep with no idea who you were or where you were going. Now you’re named and kept for good by the Shepherd of your souls.” 1 Peter 2:21-25 (MSG)

Today I have had my mind filled with the sacrifice Jesus made for us, for me. Simply saying, ‘Thank You, Lord’ just isn’t making me feel better. I know He freely did all of that because of love. Forty-five years ago this Monday I asked Christ to come into my life and save me from my sins. I did this with Dale as we knelt beside our bed. There was no altar call or music leading us to the decision, it was our Lord, gently poking and prodding us to come to Him, freely. We did. The past forty five years I have tried to put into words what the remembrance of Christ’s death has meant to me. All I can say is He did it for us. He did it for ME.