Author: marycatherinethomas

M. Catherine Thomas is a published writer, speaker and teacher. Mother of two and grandmother..

Rest Well, Buddy

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Winston George Barnhill

11 human years, 77 dog years

Winston George Barnhill passed peacefully at home last night. He was surrounded by his human family and his canine sister, Clementine, and that new animal, Lucinda the cat.

Winston was born somewhere in the Southern California/Baja Mexico region. He was adopted to bring joy, laughter, frustration and more laughter to the household.

I personally met him 9 years ago, right before Little Miss was born. He barked when he met me, and then we became good friends. I will miss Winston.

He loved to eat, often times eating his sister’s share of food, and recently sneaking some cat food and being the animal he was, he was caught nosing about the cat’s litter box. We all avoided any kisses after that.

Winston loved coming to visit us here. It was known as Grammy and Grampy’s fat farm. He would come out of the truck heavy from big city life and run around our yard becoming a lean puppy like dog again.

When I would visit him, he would greet me at the door, tail and tongue wagging in excitement. He always jumped up so he could be face to face with me. It was a wonderful greeting that was always met with a, “Winston, get down,” But, Winston and I knew it was our greeting to each other.

He would follow me around and when I sat down his face would be resting in my lap, eyes expecting me to do something. He would whine and give me his big brown eyes, and I would try to decipher exactly what was needed. Most of the time, he needed ‘butt-scratchers’. I would willingly scratch his back side, his legs dancing and his tail going a mile a minute. If I really wanted him to be at the height of enjoyment, I would scratch under his chin and chest while scratching his back side. From his expression, it was nirvana.

He was a good dog. He loved life and was always up for play. With a quiet ‘Go get it Winston’, he would set off a chase around the room. Looking for whatever he could find, be a shadow on the wall or absolutely nothing. It was often noted that he was so smart, he was dumb.

He loved Little Miss and her sisters greatly. He was their protector and defender. When they were playing or rough housing with their Dad, Winston would prance around making certain the girls were okay. Once during a particular round of rough housing, I saw him bite a toy bench, growling. So much excitement and no where to release it. The bench carries his teeth marks to this day.

Yes, he was a good boy. He will live in the hearts and memories of all who knew him. If he could speak, I hear a deep baritone voice coming from him. His personality, to me, will always be present in the character Chet the reindeer in the Santa Clause series.

Winston was full of life and love and laughter. He made the world a better place, a brighter place. He will be missed and loved always.

Have fun Winston, in the great dog park in the sky.

Mountains, Mobile, and More Stitches

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“We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” Proverbs 16:9 (NLT)

At the end of May we took a few days to go to the mountains of North Carolina. After the year we have had, we figured a trip to step away was what we needed.

Indeed, it was a welcome respite. Sitting on the porch swings and watching the sun dance through the trees and leaves. Seeing the sun on the ripples of the pond and listening to the birds and the frogs. We were removed from all the things pressing down on us. We relaxed. We reconnected with each other. We ate our way through the mountain towns during the day and came back to the cabin at night to sit some more.

It was such a wonderful time. We didn’t want it to end and as we drove toward home, we both said we wished we could have stayed longer. It was that kind of time away.

But, to home we came. Laundry, cleaning and groceries are needing to be done. But, we were relaxed and rested. It was okay.

Upon arriving home, Dale checked his messages to find out that a friend had passed away. A friend we met when we were first married. A little family who lived in an apartment above ours. They too were recently married and had a baby. They were a Coast Guard family, we, a Navy family. Our relationship was an instant one. We were together often. I never wanted children until I held their precious baby girl. She became our god-daughter. We became family.

As happens before computers and smart phones, we lost touch, until a few years ago when we rediscovered each other. Phone calls, messages, texts and we were back in touch. We had meant to go visit, but, life kept intervening. This time, life stopped and we traveled to Mobile to pay our final respects.

We didn’t know what to expect. We hadn’t seen this family in over 40 years. The day after driving to Mobile, we found ourselves at the door of our friend. As the door opened, the years were erased. Tears, laughter, memories, more laughter, more tears, holding hands and hugging. Time was erased.

We visited for a while and left so she could rest. We drove around that afternoon. Mostly lost in our own thoughts and memories. When we stopped to eat, we were once more in a place of quiet.

We sat and ate our fresh seafood, and listened to the seagulls, the sea birds, the fishing vessels. It was what we needed. A respite. A place to gather our thoughts. A time to remember.

We attended the funeral and the gathering afterwards. We returned home. A bit weary, but refreshed also.

Last week I had another surgery for my face. I can’t say I remember much of that, as I slept through it. I know that it was a process to get to the final step, that being not having a hole in the side of my nose.

The past few weeks have been a whirl wind of sorts. It was not what we had planned. But, God. He knew exactly what was going to happen. Would we have planned it all this way? No. But, in our planning we would have missed the little moments we experienced. Moments that made lasting memories for us to cherish.

The lesson I learned the most was when we saw our god-daughter for the first time. I saw her walk into the funeral home. I went over to her and found myself hugging her with my hand on the back of her head, the way I used to hold her as an infant. Tears flowed freely as I hugged her. I told her I had longed to hug her for a very long time, that my heart never forgot her. She hugged me just as tightly back.

As I came home the Lord spoke to me. He reminded me that He created me and held me as I once held our god-daughter. And like the intervening years of not being able to hug her, was like us when we walk away from the Lord. His heart longs to hold us, and keep us near to Him. The joy I felt when I saw and hugged our god-daughter is how our Lord feels when we return to Him and stay close to Him. There is a joy, a peace and a love that surpasses our understanding.

Sitting on a Porch Swing

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And He said, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” – Exodus 33:14 (NKJV)

Dale and I got away this week from our normal routine. It’s not like we live in a metropolis, no we live a quiet life on our 5 acre piece of heaven.

After the start of this year, with our daughter’s cancer and my basal cell surgeries, we needed to unwind. So we came to the mountains to a beautiful log cabin in Whittier in the Great Smoky mountains of North Carolina.

It’s a quiet place, and restful. Each night we have been serenaded by the frogs in the pond and trees. At dusk birds call to one another while the scent of honeysuckle fills the air.

Dale has fished nightly, catching and releasing a variety of fish. Fishing is his relaxing time, I know he does his talking with God during those times.

This afternoon, after going into town for lunch and ice cream, and browsing the shops we returned and sat on the porch swing. This is my favorite thing.

I sat curled up next to Dale, his arms wrapped around me. We talked about everything and nothing. We laughed together. It felt comfortable. It was peaceful. It was familiar.

I thought of vacations past. Expectations were there, as well as disappointments. This time was different. We were grateful to just be. We put away thoughts of ‘to-do’ lists. We didn’t focus on the heavy things we have just come through.

No, this part of the Lord’s glorious creation was for us to just be. The house allowed us to do so. The porch gave us space to be quiet or to laugh over silly things.

Too often we go day to day, mentally checking off things, berating ourselves for unaccomplished things. This week the Lord called us to rest and reflect. The journey for us has had it’s ups and downs, but I couldn’t have asked for a better partner to accompany me.

Frost to New Life

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“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. ” 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)

This spring we had some wild weather. It would be warm during the day and the nights would be in the low thirties, with a real feel of the twenties or teens. We didn’t put out plants until we were certain that they would survive. We have seen weather like this before, so it didn’t take us by surprise.

However, the frost got to our eucalyptus tree. It has survived many snow storms and frosts and we weren’t worried about it.

At first, I thought it was just a bit slow in turning green, but, no, we lost the tree. I haven’t had the heart to let it go, as it was a favorite of mine.

Then a couple of weeks ago I saw some green.

There, at the base, was new life. The silvery green leaves beautiful against the lifeless trunk.

As I passed it today, the Lord spoke to my heart. How often do we feel like we have been “frosted” and the life was frozen out of us? We can remain dormant/dead, or we can go to our Life source, Jesus? He makes all things new, and will bring forth new life, new adventures out of places we thought were dead and frozen.

I will now cut away the dead trunk to make room for the new life to grow and flourish in our yard. I will also search myself to see what is frozen and dead and clear that out to allow new life/ministry to grow and flourish.

It’s the Little Things

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“Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.” Luke 12:27 (NLT)

As we drove in from church today, I mentioned to Dale that our yard is a sea of dandelions after the rain we have had off and on this past week. They are a part of summer and like gray hairs, if you pull one, six more will show up.

After dinner, I went to walk. The air was a bit cooler than earlier and it was refreshing to be outside. Flies and bees were floating around, dive bombing the bushes and weeds.

Across the driveway, I looked at the woods.

This view always fascinates me. It is a small incline that gently slopes into the woods. I am always half expectant to see a bear come walking up there, but know that would not be possible during the day time as there is too much activity in the area.

I looked at the grouping of dandelions across the road. They were bunched together and I actually did thank the Lord for them.

My walk habit is to walk up our driveway and make a sweeping turn by this view. As I turned to go back down our driveway, something caught my eye (no, it was not a bear). I saw a glimpse of purple in the midst of the yellow.

On my return to the end of the driveway I went across to examine more closely what I thought I saw. There at the top of a stem was a little purple flower. We tried to take a picture of it, me, several times and then I had Dale come out to try. We ended up picking the flower and trying once it was plucked and in a vase of water.

The result is a bit fuzzy, but this flower, 3/8 of an inch, was beautiful. A lavender color on the petals and bright yellow in the stamen. The detail was exact, a perfect little blossom.

I looked at this tiny flower. It was hard to see while walking. Driving by it would be missed completely. To see it, you have to stop and look closely. Yet, God, the ultimate artist, created a small detail in nature, knowing it would be unnoticed except for a lady bug or bee.

God is a careful creator. He takes the small things, things we mostly think are insignificant and He makes them beautiful. He does this in nature, and He does this for each of us.

A Random Memory

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“Father to the fatherless, defender of widows— this is God, whose dwelling is holy.” Psalm 68:5 (NLT)

My time of walking is a time for prayer, a time to reflect and often it is a time when random things pop into my head. Today was no different.

What happened today was a memory of my Dad. I don’t often write about my Dad, I don’t know why. I have always looked like my Dad’s side of the family. I have the same unibrow he had, and I now yell at the television like he did. I like to walk like he did. There are many similarities. He was a quiet man. Conversations weren’t always easy with him. He died suddenly which was a shock to everyone. The above scripture is one the Lord gave me on the flight home from his funeral.

The random memory was about a time I spent with my Dad on an early Sunday morning, years ago. I have always been a horrible sleeper. One night must have been one of those nights that I kept my parents up also. This is how I remember the events of that early Sunday morning.

My Dad walked into the bedroom I shared with my younger sister. He said that since I was awake, I might as well get up and dressed to go to early mass. The early mass was at 5:30 a.m.

I got dressed in my new Easter jacket (a short white one, and a red rose covered headband) and off we went in the dark. After mass, the sun was just rising. We drove past our house and continued on to the cemetery. He parked at the far edge of the cemetery and we got out to walk. I had never been there before and honestly, I don’t know if I have ever gone back to that point since.

Spring flowers were just blooming. I remember holding onto my Dad’s hand and listening to him talk. I can’t remember what he said, I just have the memory of his voice talking to me. I felt so special in that moment.

We got to the edge of a hill and watched as the sun continued to rise. Below us ran the Allegheny River, hard to see at first, but glistened as the sun hit it . The sun woke the birds and they chirped as daylight began.

There were few moments like this with my Dad. It was a different time and generation. Dad’s were the quiet head of the houses. They were stern and catered to.

Later in my life, this man became the single parent to three daughters. How strange that must have been for him. I am certain he felt overwhelmed and at a loss as to what to do. But, he was steadfast in being there. Not always saying or doing things correctly, but he was a constant.

As I walked this morning, I realized that our Heavenly Father is a constant also. He is a father to the fatherless. I felt this morning that it has been too long since I walked hand in hand with Him. Like normal families, we often dash in to grab a quick snack only to dash out again to be on our way. Our Heavenly Father is understanding, but I feel like He longs for us to stop, talk, crawl up into His lap and listen as His voice fills our being with knowledge that we are special.

My Three Mothers

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This coming Sunday is Mother’s Day. Already, in my facebook memories I am seeing past posts I have made about this day. I am also seeing my friends post pictures of their Moms.

This holiday always gets to me. First of all Mothers should be honored each and every day, not just one day a year. We, (mothers) don’t need to have lavish gifts once a year to remind us that we are loved. No, and this is my personal opinion, a simple text saying ‘love you’ is enough, as long as we hear it at least once a week. A phone call is another gift that we cherish.

I have always tried to make Mother’s Day a family day. For without our family, how could we be a mother?

As I walked today thoughts of my three mothers came to mind.

Elizabeth Mae, my mother. She passed away when I was eleven. I remember her in bits and pieces. Sometimes those memories are crystal clear, like they happened yesterday, but for the most part memories of her are like looking through a frosted glass. Did they really happen? Or am I seeing a reflection of stories I have heard. Today, one memory came rushing in. I hadn’t thought of it for forever. My sister and I were fighting. I called her a name that I shouldn’t have uttered. I did it in front of my Mom. After spewing the disparaging word at my sister, I looked over to see my Mom’s expression. I took off running. I know, stupid thing to do. I just didn’t run around the inside of the house, I high tailed it outside, heading for the woods. I knew she wouldn’t follow me there. But, there she followed me! Grabbing me by the arm she popped me on the mouth. Not harshly, just enough for me to remember sixty years later. I was then reminded that she was my sister, and she deserved better. I apologized to my sister and as I think of this memory, I laugh. I underestimated how fast mothers can be.

A year after this incident my Mom passed away from pancreatic cancer.

Dottie, my older sister was my second mom. She gave up her carefree teen years to be a mother to my younger sister and myself. I did not make her role easy. I think she had the toughest role of all. She guided me through my teen years. She encouraged me to do things. She dared me to be better, to do better. I now realize that the happy memories of high school are due in part to her. She has said that my younger sister and I were her practice kids. The saying practice makes perfect shows in her children.

Marietta, is my third mother. She was so much more than a mother in law. She gave me the example of how to be a wife to her son. I often say she is my Naomi to my Ruth. Her mirthful laughter gave me hope. Her quiet conversations instructed me and guided me. I am so blessed to have had her in my life.

There were many other ‘Mothers’ in my life. Mothers of friends who would love me and care for me. Those bonus Moms who would answer questions about wardrobes when I wasn’t certain. Those who would just encourage me with a hug and a kiss.

These women all shaped me to be who I am today. I am so grateful and thankful.

“My child, listen when your father corrects you. Don’t neglect your mother’s instruction.
9 What you learn from them will crown you with grace and be a chain of honor around your neck.” Proverbs 1:8-9 (NLT)

Women’s Heart

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As I have mentioned, I attended a Ladies Retreat this past weekend. I have been to several in my lifetime and each one has had it’s own unique feeling.

Most retreats I have attended have had a feeling of getting through the speaker and sessions so it could be playtime. It’s not a bad thing to do this, as the playtime usually brings women closer to one another and forms bonds that cannot be broken. This is what I expected to experience this weekend.

How wrong I was! Yes, there was the chatting and laughter and joking around. Those of us with husbands commented on our husband’s quirks and how irritating it can be. To a casual person passing, the comments could be taken wrong. But, in looking into each other’s faces and laughing over the quirks,(which we determined was a common thing among spouses), you could feel the love each woman has for her spouse. The quirks just made our husbands who they are and they are an endearing part of them.

Other conversations centered around body image, scars, tales of how the scars happened, and laughter. Lots of laughter.

Yes, that was the normal part of a retreat.

Interspersed with each conversation women’s hearts shone through. The hearts continued the feeling of worship and praise. There was a continuation of the services we had. A genuineness.

Usually prayer is only for after the speaker is done. This weekend, prayer was as common as the laughter. Prayer and care were evident in each room you passed. The laughter would lift and then quiet and peeking into different areas you could see women hugging, praying and crying with each other.

Yes, friendship bonds were formed this past weekend. The thing I took away was the care and tenderness displayed through the women. Women are quick to share and get to the heart of matters. We will listen to the pre-story, the lead up and then the heart of a matter comes through. The trust in one another shines forth and ministry takes place.

This was a different type of retreat. The bonds of friendship were made. More important, though, was the bond of caring, of understanding, and of love, which broke through the surface and knitted this group together.

“Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.” Colossians 3:14 (NLT)

Discards

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This past weekend I attended a ladies retreat in the Great Smokey Mountains of North Carolina. During free time on Saturday myself and four other women went to the town of Bryson City. We didn’t have much time there, but we managed to roam around part of the town having lunch at a small diner and visiting several shops and back again to the diner for some ice cream.

There were signs for a Farmer’s Market and Artisan show, so we walked to see that. On the way back to get the ice cream, our group walked past a small area filled with some junk. As most of us were photographing the scenery and each other, I took some pictures of the junk pile. Yes, I know, of course I would do this.

To discard means to toss away, get rid of.

Passing by ‘junk’, possessions that were once a part of a life. A bed frame that led to sweet dreams or rest, appliances no longer worth anything. Metal left to the elements to rust and rot away.

Discards of life. No longer wanted or needed. An image of a slow rotting of things.

I looked at this area of junk. One time someone’s treasure.

Talking with the woman beside me, I said discards. She immediately looked at me and said, “God never discards us.”

I smiled and told her that’s what I was thinking, and that was the reason for taking the pictures.

Again, I was once more reminded that God speaks to all of us in everyday things. We went out to see the beautiful creations of things in a shop and God showed me junk.

One of my most favorite verses is Matthew 28:20b, “And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (NLT)

God never leaves us, He does not tire of us nor does He toss us out as useless. We will never be discards in the Lord’s sight.

Dappled Sunlight

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This morning as I walked, I saw the dappled sunlight in our front yard. I love the spring and summer sunlight, although I do grumble at the coming heat and humidity.

Today the gentle breeze was consistent and at times sent a shiver down my back. It’s early May and soon I will long for that shiver of cool.

As I walked, I was reminded of how beautiful our property is and how blessed we are to be here. I often write about our home, our yard, about the sunlight and the wind rushing through the trees. I hesitated to do so again.

But, in the midst of this rambling, the Lord showed Himself in a great way. If we quiet ourselves enough, we will see His presence in all things. This morning I attempted to do this. To look, to marvel, and to hear.

What came of all of this was an overflowing desire to praise our God. He is great! He is glorious! He has plans for each of us and will direct our steps.

My time of walking is my prayer time. I tend to start off right away with a list, my list. I pray for others, I pray for family, and sometimes I complain when I see things that need to be done. In the middle of my usual routine today, I stopped. I stood still and it occurred to me that the Lord knows my routine.

I looked around me and said, “Today, I will choose to praise You. You know my heart. You know what I am droning on in prayer. You are already in the middle of the situations I am praying for. So, today is my day to thank You, to praise You and to remember You and Your deeds.”

“Who is like You among the gods, Lord? Who is like You, majestic in holiness, Awesome in praises, working wonders?” Exodus 15:11 (NASB)